Sometimes I wished that I had the capacity to live throughout the day without having to sleep totally. Of course,sleeping is a luxury that many people yearn for especially in these stressful ages but when it comes to a point when you just wanna get things done in a limited amount of time, it is not desired at all.


Now that I'm finally settling down for the arduous preparation for A Levels, the flesh is willing but the soul is weak. The sleep debts that I have incurred from the past few months are paying their dues. Although it's good that this doesn't occur during the 3rd and subsequent quarters of this year, I have to admit that it's rather frustrating especially when you've already prepared yourself mentally to endure the late nights, and when you're really trying your best to focus during the extra lessons and remedials these few days.



I have to add that even in my zombie state, I managed to "update" myself on information that I have missed during the first 5 months of this year...On a slightly more optimistic note, Lit consultation with Lorraine Lee was more productive than I expected. We managed to cover more than 3/4 of the Practice Questions for Poe and we did a little bit of poetry comparison. It's like a mini-crashcourse on Lit albeit a rather enjoyable one cos it made me all fired up for Lit again =)


And just when I'm immersed in this "literature" mode, Debrina had to introduce me to this music video by Panic! at the Disco. Many underlying messages and classy [and appropriate!] gestures by the lead singer:


http://youtube.com/watch?v=vc6vs-l5dkc


San Yi just called from home. Had a much-needed heart-to-heart talk for about an hour. Guess I have to face it before it's too late. It's hard to please everyone so, the moral of the story is: Don't even try. It's simpler to make the One Above happy :)



O2 Jam rocks! [even though I'm ranked the lowest among me and my siblings] But I'm not complaining. I'm just "inadequate in the coordination of motor skills", to put things in a nicer way :D

Photos...

From Geraldine's blog:stoning during econs class (I wonder why...)

At Mimi's sister's birthday BBQ




ALTO 2s!



Photos from Parents' Appreciation Night @ FCBC:

The epitome of true love

My brother's impish grin fails to capture Mum's heart :P
Mum and Gong Gong

30th May:Our Swansong

Choir Concert has ended and so has my journey with tpjchoir. Now that I am free from all Choir practices,rehearsals and whatnot, somehow I 'm beginning to miss it. Well, one can never understand human nature totally...we start to cherish what we dread after it is over...sigh...

Concert was a blast! Seriously...I felt that everyone really put in a lot of effort in memorising the 20 over songs and that the whole stagefright nonsense was gone! I guess we really proved to a whole lot of people that an SYF judging doesn't determine the standard of a Choir totally. Although some songs were really quite horrible such as the 2 songs by the J2 Chorus (seriously wasted man cos we sounded fine during rehearsals), others were OK! I'm sure the audience enjoyed the 2 Indonesian songs A LOT! =)



Sinten Nungung Sepur!

Sin Sin Si batu manikam dipat joget Sor madi gotem.......

Pong! Pong! Pong! Pong!

"dang tu tu na uli!"








J2 Chorus: More than I could ask for...

Folklore segment

The alumni item was better than expected although someone commented that our sound did not travel far enough for the back row of VCH to hear properly...Thank God we did not screw up cos during rehearsals that afternoon, the Choreo wasn't confirmed yet. Initially we wanted to do a Dikir Barat rendition of "Stand by Me" but if we did, the sound would be compromised...nevertheless, it was good...


practising during rehearsals...




Dikir Barat done the Choir way!







Rehearsals...





Really extremely glad that everything's over now: no more rushing in between concert repertoire to change into costumes, no more worrying about whether we sound good or not....haha!






THE FULL FORCE

Combined item with AJChoir really shook VCH man! Hahahaha! Could seriously feel the emotions...Moreover, it helps when Nelson is only a few inches close to you!

tpjchoir + ajchoir

Post-Choir moments were simply chaos...it felt like a riot onstage especially when the VCH Staff kept creating intentional blackouts just so that we could vacate the premises quickly...

ALTOS!

Emogang crashing in!



=)

'Will always remember the people that went through this arduous but enjoyable journey with me. These are just SOME of them though:

Aunty Zhiyi!



Duc!
Ai Ping (and since Charlie Brown's in the picture), Charlie Brown!



Dixon!

Olivia Kammm!!!

The Sopranos + Ai Ping and me




Louis the Bosom Buddy!

Seng Juong!

Sochenda!!!! You're the best! =)

And not forgetting the people who came to support me:

Chen Cuiwen and Fan Cuiwen

Thanks Cuiwens!!! Chen Cuiwen, COCO Concert next! Fan, seriously,I know I've said this countless times but thanks for rushing from your triathlon training just to support me! I couldn't ask for more! * sobs sobs*

Also, Bertwin who came despite being broke and who bought Chocolates for Ai Ping and me...argh!!! Really don't know what to say man!

Not forgetting Maggie which was very unexpected. Thanks for the Toblerone! =)

And also Nat and Ruth for coming....sorry that you couldn't find me backstage and all but thanks for the flower (now withered) and the Merci Chocolates (now in Nat's stomach!)

Who could ever forget my family: my mum for coming even though she doesn't appreciate Choral music, my sister for putting in so much effort in dressing up for the event and my second aunt for getting the bouquet of expensive-looking roses. Also, a show of appreciation to third aunt who tried to make it but couldn't because of her business trip.

Oh ya! Also to Dad who decided to show moral support and not attend cos 10 bucks was worth more than his daughter...

Also thanks to Jillian for the rose, Luke for the bouquet,and the Cuiwens for the assortment of Chocolates and Sweets, Baozhu for the flower, Winnie for the toy and Sher Chua for the rose (!!!)

Special thanks to Mimi who made the beautiful scrapbook and Olivia for her finger puppet pencil as well as Weilin for that touching card....

Oh man...really wished this could last forever....haha!

Now you know why I had such a hard time deciding for the Pattaya trip....Sigh,back to reality for now...A Levels......argh...

Overdue photos...


Sports Day

Othello @ NYJC

Rachel !




While waiting for more than half an hour for the bus

Concert coming up soon....I've sold all my tickets, thanks partly to Evatte and all those who bought from me! =)

Nelson was in a foul mood today 'cos only half the Choir reached Siglap at the stipulated time. As such, Choir with Nelson today was rather stiff and awkward. 'Was feeling really exhausted today (ran out of words to describe tiredness...heh heh) to the point that I made more mistakes than before with regards to Choreography...even during "Ta Xue Xun Mei", I couldn't remember my part...sigh...

On the way to practice today, we met with another incident similar to that of City Hall MRT Station. Charlie Brown,Sochenda,Ai Ping,Duc,Seng Keat and I were on bus 10 to Siglap. If I'm not wrong, Duc was drinking from his bottle when a passenger turned to Charlie Brown and asked him whether we were from TPJC. He asked Charlie Brown why he didn't stop Duc from drinking on the bus 'cos it was against the law. Charlie Brown then replied that he didn't see him drinking and that even if he did, he may be just drinking plain water. After that, the passenger turned to his friend and told him that he would make a complaint about it. (.......)

This is really ridiculous...

GP Test today was OK except for the Summary in Comprehension which affected my AQ. Anyway, what's done is done. Not gonna think so much about it.

Argh..anyway, today's entry is rather shallow 'cos I'm typing this while trying my best to remain awake...

22nd May 2007

This is becoming really draining...I really wish that Choir Concert would come and go quickly. Seriously, everyday this week (week 10) is just a vicious cycle. It's as if the intent behind all these is to anticipate the day when your body just can't take it anymore and collapse or something.
Anyway, after the internal struggle between me and myself, I've finally decided not to go for the Pattaya trip. It's not that I really don't want to go or, according to Nelson's viewpoint, that I hate TPJChoir, but that my studies call for my attention.
NUS Psychology seems like a far-fetched idea for now...

OK, I'm not going to start moaning about the standard of my schoolwork and tests now 'cos it would demoralize me further.
For all the opportunity costs incurred such as lagging behind in the area of academics and whatnot, we get to sing with confidence (a debatable point here I must say) without holding scores, together with choreography and hopefully, dynamics and emotions (though I seriously believe that the emotion that we can express involuntarily now is exhaustion.)
And I realized that practices everyday is really making me go insane to the point where I exhibit extreme emotions such as isolation from current society (Lit students, revision for Poe stories, please.)
My anti-social tendencies are coming into full swing again. It's not that I don't want to but I can't help it: I'm already so deadbeat that even if I say anything, it wouldn't be that useful anyway. It's like it becomes increasingly hard to even smile genuinely when someone tells a joke or show empathy (much less give advice) to a friend who shares her troubles with you. Every little thing irritates me. The mood swings are so common that people are starting to link it to my personality (or so I feel). Argh...I feel superficial. And I can't even act like my normal self.
Ok, I'm sounding like how I should sound for my age: ever the angsty, emotional teen.

Choreography for “Sin Sin” wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. The difficulty doesn't lie with coming up with the actions itself but whether the Choir would be sporty enough to actually perform it. I mean it really wasn't easy for Sochenda, George and Seng Juong, plus many others who have helped out in the brainstorming of actions, to come up with the choreography and I believe they are doing it with the Choir's interests at heart so, we should really just be agreeable to what they have proposed, unless of course we have better ideas upon which we can suggest...
Speaking of “Sin Sin”, it's the only song I look forward to in Choir now. Hmm, then again it's the Choir's all-time favourite song. Ok, maybe “Ja vem Primavera” and “Vita de la mia Vita” aren't too bad either. It's just that singing “Sin Sin” itself is a challenge (initially) due to the tongue-twisters that make up 99.9999% of the song! And although I've said it many times, the Basses get the nicest part of the song! Nevertheless, at least we get to perform it. =)
“Sin Sin Si Batu Manikam dipat joget sor mardi gotem...”

Felt slightly better today even though last night was terrible. I was wondering when such a breakdown would happen 'cos I have been handling it moderately well,in fact, maybe better than expected. Anyways, after the airport trip with Ai Ping yesterday after Sports Day (which was quite a waste of time), was feeling so much better although I suffered the consequences of a chocolate overdose in school today. (Think of what one whole bottle of Meiji Chocolate Milk, loads of Andes Chocolates, many slices of pizza, a packet of Ruffles potato chips can do to your stomach!)


Choir Forum really helped in lifting my spirits, all the comments by Gabriel, Matthew and the J1s plus some J2s were really encouraging and super funny :D


And we weren't sharp by 4 semitones but only 1! (which is normal for any excited and perky Choir performing in a competition). Mistake on Gabriel's part. Phew!


Moreover, the fact that the 2 conductors were really affected by it made the recovering process easier. They didn't expect it to turn out this way too. (Nelson couldn't sleep because of us, his only Choir that got Silver and Mr.Low said that we did well.)


Anyways, we received word that the reason of us getting a Silver could be due to our intonation. And seriously, I feel rather unjustified by this. I mean, it didn't occur to me that this would even be the criteria other than pitching, expression and dynamics...



INTONATION?!?!?!?!


I seriously have nothing to say man....this is really something that is subjected to one's discretion....


Choir aside, it's time for a reality check. Many tests lined up one day after another (Faculty Test, Common Test, Block Test,Mid-year Exams...whatever...they're still tests) And the bad news is, I'm seriously behind the class. SERIOUS.





God help me.





And I'm sorry to say this but I've had enough of you. I don't even understand why you're complaining about practices ALL the time and thinking of skipping it just for the sake of your studies, without even considering that your fellow friends are going through the same thing. I mean,it's important that we prioritise studies over Choir but during the days leading to SYF period, it's unfair to place academics first. And also, all the unnecessary bitching about a certain someone should be done WITH THOUGHT. Why don't you try being in his position and accounting to the Choir after the results were announced? It's not as easy as it sounds. It really hurts me to even think such thoughts of you 'cos I regard you as a super close friend,in fact, maybe a sister. Seeing you during Sports Day didn't help either. It's amazing how you can seem so unnaturally happy at a time like this. It's as if your intention for joining Choir is purely done to secure a perfect record on your SGC. Argh, I don't know...

I am still in a state of shock.


Hmm...didn't really expect this to happen even though there was this nagging feeling that told me that it wouldn't be a smooth ride after all. Anyway, all of us knew how the school would react when we broke the news to them 'cos after all, many expected us to produce Gold, if not Gold with Honours. Well, the critics out there, especially those from certain performing arts groups ( I said CERTAIN), would be having a field day now...I guess and it didn't help that some have already approached the Choir people and "comforted" them...


Maybe I'm being angsty and bitchy but you can't blame me for the state I'm in now 'cos I really gave EVERYTHING....imagine all the sacrifices,meetings,scoldings and practices that we have to put up with and what do we get in the end?



And the worse part is, we are not even sure what went wrong, the people present were equally puzzled too...All I knew was that we certainly went sharp but going sharp by 4 semitones is unforgivable (according to the recordings on the Choir forum). And you have no idea how hard I tried to suppress that bundle of nerves onstage just to ensure that we wouldn't go flat or sharp and that the emotions would be able to flow freely....



Of course there would be some that really think that we are good and that there might be some error or glitch on the judges' part...that one SYF doesn't prove how good/bad we were but Olivia has a point: People only look at the results in the end. They wouldn't bother to argue and discuss what went wrong and so on....


Maybe we really derserve it 'cos there were some who didn't put in their best, or so I heard. It's surprising how they can just shrug it off and move on so quickly that it almost seems unnatural. Anyway, it doesn't matter now 'cos what's done is done.


I can just imagine what would happen during assembly when the results are announced...


Ms. Quek and Prem were right in saying that it doesn't matter how hard we fall but how we pick ourselves up after that. I guess eventually we would be fine but it isn't easy to forget that you made history in a different way when you know that you could be painting a different picture in the first place.


This really reminds me of what happened in secondary school. Maybe Ai Ping was right, we're jinxed,haha....


I'm just sad that people who worked so hard and sacrificed so much had to face the consequences as well. I mean, they are really sincere in their efforts and everything...


'Guess that we wouldn't appear on tpjc.net's "SYF Gold" list after all: something that our dear critics would gloat about.

For now, studies would be my solace..haha....I'll be fine....