Sundown was the worst and best half-marathon ever. Let's start with the bad news,shall we?

Met up with Trina at Pasir Ris MRT to catch the shuttle to Changi Exhibition Centre but as the queue was very long,we decided to cab. At the taxi stand, we agreed to share cab with a Caucasian and another female runner and the latter gave the driver the wrong directions! She thought that Changi Exhibition Centre was Expo, for goodness sake. And I even asked her whether she got it right but she insisted that the 2 venues were the same. So when we got there and realised that we were at the wrong place (with the ang mo guy muttering profanities under his breath already), we were very late...about 8.45pm, to be precise. And the race starts at 9pm.

So we started to flag cabs in desperation and tried to beat the taxi queue by pleading with the driver. Thank God for this Malay cab driver, who sacrificed his family time (not to mention the chances that he might be fined for picking passengers that were not in the queue) just to rush us there! Reached at 9.20pm, but due to the road closure, we had to run-walk at least 5km to the starting point! Very bad logistics planning here, organisers! Roads were still jammed even after the race. We were stuck in the same parking spot in Nelvin's car for at least half an hour before we could move out!

Anyway, back to the main point. I was quite angry with the runner for messing up everything but thinking back, I regretted that I didn't control my feelings well but, to think that we wasted so much energy running 5km even before the race! We made it for the second flag-off timing though. And that's where the best part comes in and I really thank God for it cos I wouldn't have made it without Him and my ipod. My timing improved 'cos I didn't walk at all but the water points after the 15km mark were a necessity.

Felt my world spinning at the 17km mark. Speaking about that, the distance markers this time round were quite misleading. One moment I was happy 'cos I thought I passed the 8km mark but I realised that it was for the 10km category. But the route was not bad even though it was a never-ending straight road 'cos we get to see the occasional airplane taking off just beside us.

According to my watch, I managed to clock at least 2hrs20mins but I really salute Trina man. She was much faster, without a doubt, but she was ill, so imagine what her timing would be if she was in optimal condition. Went for supper with Alan, Nelvin and their friends after that but I didn't eat cos I thought I would be having supper after that but guess what, Mom waited up for me so my hopes of having prata were dashed, haha...

Suffering from abrasions and my legs are aching badly especially the kneecaps but the satisfaction gained surpasses it all :)

Went for Famine Camp training last Sat with Trina. Have to admit that I sorta dragged my feet there initially cos it was held in the morning at ACS Barker so imagine what time I had to wake up! But it was better than expected, especially the games. Expected it to be the usual "Amazing Race,been-there-done-that" type of games but it turned out otherwise. Not only did it meet the objectives in bringing forth the message about poverty,but it was actually fun. It's something like The Sims where one belongs to a "family" and experiences events in real life (eg.you have to get vaccinated and educated, get a job and provide for your "family" and stuff). And just like reality, there'll be illegal services to get quick money (eg.prostitution, organ trading), which will lead to a higher possibility of "contracting HIV/AIDS." In essence, we get to experience how it is like to live in poverty in a third-world country.

Think the people in my group were the most "rah-rah" of all the groups. And I still can't get over the fact that out of the 2 guys in my group, one of them's called Duc! I mean,what are the odds man?!

Anyway, I'll be participating as one of the many game masters for the event, won't get to experience it as a camper but hope it'll be a success. Especially looking forward to the flash mob during the finale concert too!

The jersey for this year's Adidas Sundown marathon is so much nicer than previous year's, which was orange. It's black,white and red and it's sleeveless too,nice! :D Hope that all the running and gymming, although last minute, will pay off this Sat...

I'm so glad that I visited my grandparents yesterday...found out that Yeye is a closet camwhore! Cos we started taking photos with my phone. I'm just glad that they had a good time. Maybe I should make each visit an interesting one,haha...just airing my thoughts a lil' (chinese chess for the next visit? hmmm...)

Mothers' Day 2010: The Belated Edition

Why belated? you ask...well, it's cos mom and I had a minor tiff the night before so I wasn't really in the mood to even wish her, but after my emotions got the better of me, I decided that one day of quarrelling shouldn't supersede mom's many years of love and sacrifice for us, so I decide to humble myself and apologise,haha...glad I did anyway. Mom was really happy (as you can see), sorted our issues and best of all, she took a second helping (which means the cake wasn't a failure at all,haha!)

Mom still looks as pretty as her wedding day, not kidding :)


Bro was sleeping so, no pictures! haha...


Ohya, in case you were wondering, this is French Coffee Cake without coffee (ironic right, like Hokkien Mee without prawns...haha). The ingredients are pretty simple, the usual butter, self-raising and plain flour, egg, milk, white and brown sugar (the latter constitutes part of the topping together with walnuts, which makes the cake rather sweet) and surprisingly, even my sis likes it (she prefers sour to sweet stuff).

Hope my grandfather will be able to teach me how to make his banana-raisin muffins soon, thinking about it makes me salivate...(not a pretty sight I know)

Happy holidays! :D

Woke up at 2 today, can feel the biological clock phase-delaying already...

Devotion today reminded me of how great God is. I know this sounds like the typical, everyday Christian exhortation but it's really just amazing how one can love the unloved,or even people who persecuted and betrayed you in the blink of an eye. To me it's just absurd: imagine someone you love and care for (or even your arch enemy) boxes you, out of the blue, and all you do is stand there waiting for another punch and not retaliating.
And despite that He loves us so much that we can't even comprehend the depths of His love. The ODB phrases it as such:"Someone who loves us with a devotedness that is a mystery how we as sinners ever deserved it" and that "His love is wide, long, deep, and high and exceeds our knowledge (Ephesians 3:18-19)."

Loving someone is already tough by itself and I'm not even talking about people you dislike. That's where you get family/sibling conflict (mine manifests itself mostly as cold war actually, not the deep-heated verbal argument type,haha)and maybe sometimes even among friends. Hence it shouldn't be surprising that the cell group gave such practical answers when asked what love means to them a few weeks ago.
If love was really that easy, there wouldn't be marital conflict and the escalating number of divorce rates to match.

That is why, coming back to God's love again, His love would never fail us, like it or not, and that is another reason why I don't think backsliding is an option (not that I'm planning to) cos even if you deny/escape from God, He'll always be there. It's like sometimes you wanna run away from your family (just giving an example), and be free from their complaints and repulsive habits but ultimately, they'll still be there.

Speaking about family, I'm reminded of my mom. My aunts were asking me to coax mom to travel to Shanghai with them next month with my grandparents cos my mom refuses to go, and her reason was that she has to wake Maib up for school (!!!). I told mom that Maib can jolly well wake up on her own, using her 3 alarm clocks (yes, she literally has 3) and since she can do that on Saturdays for netball training, I don't see why it's different for weekdays.
Sometimes I feel mom should just take a break and stop worrying so much about us. In fact, she's being too selfless already and I hope we won't take it for granted. She should go and enjoy herself for once! Tell me what can I do to convince her?!

There was once I ask her what would she do if housework didn't exist in the world at all; she gave me a blank stare. And that is the reason why I'm always plagued with the Mothers' Day Dilemma: she's easily contented, yet practical and demanding at the same time. Jewelry, fluffy ornaments and trinkets wouldn't work for her, even flowers (In her own words: "what's the use of getting flowers when they'll die anyway?"). I can't even bake for her 'cos she doesn't fancy Western foodstuff and if I get books, she'll retort that it's a waste of money as she borrows from the library weekly. How,how,how?!

Haha, I digressed again. Just saw a picture of Jumbo restaurant's Deep Fried Beancurd Special on my desk and it's enough to prime me to rummage in my refrigerator for brunch now...'till then!

Day 3 of much-awaited holiday period is here!

Woke up at half past 1 but it turned out to be a productive day... Packed the whole wardrobe, cleared out unwanted clothes and bags. Packed the bookshelves after that (there's more space for new novels now! so excited!). Guess what, I'm so proud of my bro today - he voluntarily (yes, on his own initiative) packed Daddy's messy pig sty of a study area and tidied the whole computer area! 'think he got up on the wrong side of the bed today. My sis caught the spring cleaning bug too and packed her study table. Mom was pleasantly surprised and she was one happy mom today (she even gave up her precious bath time slot just to let me bathe first, without complaining! haha!)
I think housework gives you an endorphin-high. I was finding more things to do after packing so I mopped the floor and cleared and packed my study table (looks like I packed my whole room today). 'Was dancing to Britney Spears' Circus while mopping. And bro gave me his speakers for my ipod, woohoo! Whatever drug he's on, he should take it more often..haha..

Managed to watch The Bounty Hunter and also Ghajini (the Hindi film) last night, the plot for the latter didn't meet expectations, it was quite fragmented, although it was quite hilarious that they can insert their famous dance numbers at any point of the storyline. Ghajini's based on the American film Memento, although it didn't do as well as the American version though. And Guzarish and Kaise Mujhe wasn't featured in any of the song numbers! Disappointed! :(

The American soldiers based in Afghanistan who did the remake of Lady Gaga's Telephone made my day man! Feel quite sad for them though, hope they can go home and be reunited with their families soon.

Love holidays so much but I predict all this excitement will dwindle in a months' time.

endless, random mutterings...mutter,mutter,mutter...

I'm back! :D Not that anyone actually bothers since I think readership for this blog is close to zilch now (the only person I know who's still following would be LY,haha!) Pardon me for my writing skills, the phrasing in this post seems fragmented and odd but the thoughts in my head are flowing so quickly such that it cannot be translated fast enough to be typed out as coherently as I would like it to be.

Anyway, it's the 3-month break again and I will try my very best to make it as meaningful and purposeful, and of course as enjoyable as possible. I've been looking forward to this day for a long time. Workload for this semester is really crazy and if not for God, some of the church people, and not to mention a few noteworthy friends, my sanity level is still intact.

Looking back on exams, I think it was pretty OK and I'm hoping that I can see a few As this time (apologise for all the academic talk again but I'd rather rant and rave all I want here - where (I think)nobody actually reads, than complain incessantly to everyone around me about how tough school is). Sometimes I wonder why do I get so easily stressed up with school and why can't I take it easy for once. Actually, come to think of it, I think I've cut some slack upon entering uni, primarily cos the motivation to study is dwindling.

Anyway, talking about school makes me sick.

Today was great compared to the past few days. I woke up earlier than usual (10am - although still late by the standards of most people) and actually I had a bout of insomnia last night but it was worse - I was very tired but I couldn't sleep - and that's like the worse feeling to me, it's like you're contradicting yourself. Maybe it was due to the effect of the Teh Tarik I had after church,or maybe it's due to the euphoric high of post exams. Nevertheless, today was great, didn't feel as stressed, the pile of books and notes on my table's gone and I got 2 dresses from Far East! :D (although sadly it's formal wear again, it's rare to find nice informal dresses that will catch my eye!)

Will try my bestest to find motivation to look for a job (I need income for travelling!!) I've been forming travel plans in my head since ages ago (to Bangkok, Bali, Australia, even JB) but I have a feeling it might never happen. Arghh...might be a good thing though, more time to expand my reserves and plan for a better trip.

Hmm,not sure if I should say this but I've been having this underlying thought for a month. As much as I've been studying about people and behaviour (with psych and all), the complexities of us humans are just too overwhelming to be captured adequately in a couple of textbooks and studies. Therefore, it's never surprising to find an article investigating a certain behaviour being disputed and contradicted by another finding. We are such a complex and contradictory species. If we were the antithesis of my previous sentence, problems in the world might be lesser (but on second thought, I wonder if the world would be a better place without problems).

The reason which I brought this up was partly cos of the fact that I hate it when some people can be nice at one moment, only to have them judging you in the blink of an eye, especially when you have sorta convinced yourself, defended their case in your head, and rendered them as a "nice person." Don't get me wrong, it's only human nature to judge people (I'm "unconsciously" guilty of that too, sad to say) but I think it's rather disturbing for them to show it explicitly and think that I won't realise what's going through their minds. I may be wrong at times but so far, my intuition has been rather spot-on (which can be bad at times). Sometimes, the problem doesn't even concern them, and I think they have no right to clamp me down with rhetoric on how I should live my life and the choices I make. I will claim responsibility for any mistakes I make (though they might be costly ones), thank you very much for your unnecessary concern. Repress something and it will come back stronger than ever.

And it's quite sad that sometimes these vibes come from the people closest to you, those that you trust will understand why/how you're feeling like that, or behaving this way.

On another note, ever felt like you worked hard for something persistently for years but that effort fails to yield results, or maybe the outcome doesn't match what you expect it to be?

Most of the time, I am more or less satisfied with whatever I get, after reflecting on the amount of effort put in and the actual outcome. I know,deep down,that when I am determined to get something, I would go all out to achieve it and really work my ass off, that's how I am, but it doesn't seem to be happening for this thing in particular and I'm upset (quite an understatement actually).
Anyway, I've been trying to forget it and get back into a normal state of mind, return to the ebb and flow of what should be the life I'm leading but I can't help it and it's pathetic. But to be fair to myself, I think I've made improvement over the years (in terms of self-regulation) and that itself is a feat, considering how emotional I can be. A probable reason why this thing keeps bugging me is cos every time I feel like giving up/actually gave up, it comes back (unknowingly) to reclaim its position again, as if it knows that I have given up on it, staking its royal territory in my mind again. I feel like one of the rats in Skinner's experiments on a random reinforcement schedule man....when will this vicious cycle end?! It's just so frustrating,waiting and guessing...

OK enough for now. Sundown's coming and I have yet to start my jogging regime. Why,why,why did I not learn my lesson and sign up for it again after AHM?!?! 'Been telling myself that I'll do it just to get the shirt,haha!