Pre-camp postulations

Hello people of the world!

Life's a beach these days. Late nights, waking up to the lunch hour, being immersed in novel after novel, eating whatever I want and going wherever I want at my own time and pace,etc...love the hols man! :D

Having said that, thank God that Sophie-D did reasonably well for her French and other modules!

Anyway, I'll be going away for church camp from tomorrow till Friday afternoon and much as I wanna get out of Singapore asap, a part of me seems reluctant to leave our sunny shores. This camp wouldn't be the same as the previous few cos Esther,Sab and Mid wouldn't be there (which means no late-night chats, playing of pranks and pillow fights!), this is Mum's maiden experience (the family's rooming together) and we'll be leaving on the last coach at the latest timing, much to my aunt's dismay...haha...

On the plus side, I won't have to worry about my meals (for eg. what to have for the next dinner,etc...), the hotel seems pretty interesting (heard they have some horses there to ride or something like that), there'll be plenty of time to swim and I think I have potential supper buddies! :D

Nevertheless, I hope and pray that everything will be much better than expected. But of course I'll miss people like Roy (You're first on the list, be honoured!), I'll miss Ellen D. (stay gay and happy), I'll miss Shisei (heh heh), I'll miss Papa Bear, jogging with Zhiyi (I promise I'll try to fix another date k!) Swensen's 1-for-1 Deal, Tampines One and it's air-con, Cold Storage's Black Pepper Chicken, the hot blazing Singapore afternoons (not!), my bed, my fave hangout Tampines library (and the smell of books), and definitely not the Stinky Blob (haha...no la,of course he'll be dearly missed when I remember him, that is!)

Have a sexaye holidaye! :D

Whose line is it anyway - Funniest Songstyles ever!

CAN'T STOP LAUGHING...OH MANNNNNNN! XD She just kept flexing and parading throughout! And that traumatic expression on Wayne's face after she left! Priceless!!! AHAHAHAHA!

tenacious ten

Week 3 of my holidays. I've been waking up to the sound of my clock ticking at 2pm almost everyday, save for the days when I jog/swim. Although I have a whole list of things that I plan to do, there would inevitably be more time for thinking and be buried in thoughts, sometimes to the extent that sleep at night is compromised. Ironically, all this thinking would wear me out and cause me to sleep in the afternoons! Anyway, presenting the top 10 of the month:

(1) Discovering a new-found abhorrence for rape
Came about after reading a novel recently. The dehumanisation and disrespect for females was too much to take. Didn't help that the rapist was so masochistic and sadistic. This isn't even about feminism but basic rights for all individuals.

(2) Irony of mind vs. mouth
Was thinking about my self (as usual). Realised that my mind speaks more than my mouth, and my mouth thinks more than my mind.

(3) The thing about fairy tales and love stories
Hate to say this but I'm growing increasingly skeptical about happy endings, which is scary even to me cos I thought I'll be the last person to think so.

(4) Love & Acceptance
Carried forward from the previous point. If Life was a book, then Love and Acceptance would be its main themes and we, its pawns. Just look around you, you can see it everywhere in people's eyes.

(5) Spongebob Squarepants
I feel like a sponge.

(6) Silence is Golden: Silence and Gold
Both can overwhelm us due to its weight.

(7) Australia
I miss Cui and Dhab.

(8) Paris
Didn't turn out like what I imagined! (after seeing Esther's photos). Hmm...Norway wouldn't disappoint, would it?

(9) Simple joys
Was enjoying a chocolate bar with Sab in the church shuttle. Didn't realise that such simple pleasures could bring so much joy!

(10) The intentional act of remembering: small talk
People usually forget. Never fails to amaze me when friends bother to ask and show concern about the nitty-gritties of my life (from where they left off).

Charice Pempengco in Korea - part 1

Young girl with a big voice! If I'm not wrong, her performance here prompted Ellen Degeneres to fly her all the way from her hometown (The Philippines) to be on Ellen's show!

straight from the horse's mouth...

I've never understood the power of Prayer and how it could impact me so deeply until tonight. Like everyone else at some point of their life, I was quite sceptical about Prayer. (In case you do not already know, Christians are humans too and are equally susceptible to making mistakes just like anyone else).

I do pray but occasionally, I'll have my doubts. Sometimes I get frustrated when I feel that nothing seems to be happening, or when Prayer seems like a one-way conversation and it feels like I'm talking to myself, but in this world where instant gratification becomes almost second nature, the notion of patience as a virtue becomes quite undervalued.

My thoughts are a little jumbled now but what I'm trying to say is this: When it comes to talking to God, it is the only time when you can really be your true self, where all the facades, the superficiality and the pride you parade in front of others (in order to gain their acceptance) gets stripped away, layer by layer, as you realise that there's nothing to hide in His presence cos He knows everything. You can really unload and tell Him everything in a way that you might not be able to with others (how you feel or felt about certain things, etc...). Sometimes, in the process, He will show you hints of what you should be doing/how you should be facing your problem instead. And the more you talk to Him and present to Him your version of things that happened, you gradually realise the loophole(s) which you might have overlooked before.

Prayer is like a tete-a-tete with God. As there is no pressure/interrogation from people that might instigate you to be defensive (and justifying your actions with whatever excuses you can come up with, at that point, to counter the verbal tirade), you start to gain perspective on where you have erred (if you're praying about a problem, that is).

You might be sceptical about Prayer but you never know, until you are actually in that situation where there seems to be no way out. Maybe it might help if you see it as a way of preventing yourself from wallowing in the mire of self-pity, when you actively seek to find solutions to your problem(s) instead.

You might also question why He doesn't answer your prayer(s) but then again, we must remember that God knows us better than we know ourselves. Our immaturity/lack of foresight might lead us to pray for things that are not appropriate to have at that point of time. Sometimes, He knows that you might be better off not having the thing you requested for,and it's only in the future when you look back again and realise that it is actually a blessing in disguise.

Then again, you might be doubting God due to Christians you have met, who do not seem to be walking the talk and exemplifying what they believe in, but remember that they are just like any individual, equally as vulnerable if they are not careful. In fact, God is aware of this irony when He says that "These people draw near to Me with their mouth, and honour Me with their lips, but their heart is far from Me." (Matthew 15:8-9).

Anyway, one thing's for sure: I think most of you will definitely agree that you cannot depend on your friends all the time, no matter how strong the friendship is, for they will surely fail you at some point. At these times, remember that God is always there when you're feeling your most vulnerable and when everything seems so bleak that it starts to overwhelm you to the extent that you start to lose hope in everything.

Remember that He is always willing to listen to whatever you have to say, even though you might feel that there is no weight in your words. If He can carry the weight of the world on His shoulders, then there really is no problem too big that He cannot solve.

I know that I'm the last person on earth to have the right to gush about the wonders of prayer but maybe by typing this out, it will serve as a reminder to seek Him instead of constantly looking to the left and right for answers all the time.

the week, of a nutcase, in a nutshell

YAY! I'M SO HAPPY HAPPY HAPPAYYEEE! :D

I've been on an adrenaline high (the unpleasant kind, mind you) for the past week due to the extra lectures to makeup for public holidays, Japanese Studies Project, the 2 French tests (which was so-so even though I felt that I could have done better for Oral), and the stooopid Stats Project, which not only caused a lack of sleep but significant hair loss (I could seriously see the increasing number of stray hairs on my shirt!). I'm not gonna see another "Gender and Book-carrying behaviour" experiment for good. The words are still swirling in my head man...

It felt as if my brain had to be on "thinking-mode" for the whole week, even though this should be the case, assuming that we should be "thinking" when we're in school but somehow, it made me think of a PC on hibernating mode with programs running in the background. And also, my right eye keeps twitching at random periods of the day for no particular reason...

Hmm..much as I'm relieved that this week is over, and Semester 2 finally coming to a close (save for exams), my behaviour this week was a little annoying, even to myself. I was more irritable than usual and got upset over the most trivial things and relapsed into the "in-your-face" kinda anti-social behaviour. Reminds me of one of the previous blog entries where I complained about my disgusting attitude too...hope this won't be a vicious cycle...

Anyway, I'm really grateful for my friends and the people around me who were very understanding and encouraging throughout the week. And I really have to thank God for Sarah, and subsequently Sylvia, who intervened at the right moment and assisting me with my Stats report. (At that time, I felt really helpless that I could not even identify the appropriate Statistics to run for my dataset that I asked God to find someone who would help me out. Turned out that the person He sent could not only provide much-needed help, but she took 3 out of the 4 modules I'm currently taking, coincidental or what?). On top of helping with the report, Sarah even gave me clues for the French tests, which she sat for earlier, which was really nice of her. Made me ponder about the "dog-eat-dog world" issue all over again...

Well, exams officially commences in 2 weeks' time and this week has really knocked some sense into me. However, I can feel myself getting more and more nonchalant about my academic state, which is quite worrying since exams are around the corner and the stuff I know about my 3 modules are insufficient to warrant a good grade. Sometimes I think I deserve to learn things the hard way man...

Besides that, this week was a rather eventful one. Tampines One is my new fave hangout cos Duc and I kept checking out the queue for Uniqlo (and wondering when we could ever go in, even though I kept suggesting that Plan B would have worked if we tried...haha!). Also, Sab and Maib went to g12 last Wednesday (so pai seh cos I was late that day when usually I would have so much time to kill!) and today was the ultimate cos I was out the whole day: school in the morning, lunch at Amoy, Tampines One (yet again), youth service, supper...

Found out that I was scheduled for Ladies' Basketball for the upcoming season. Wonder if I will survive the season, or even participate in it at all, cos Basketball is really no joke man. More scratches, more running, even though more pounds will be shed...

Arghh,really cannot take it anymore...that's all for now. Auditions tomorrow. Hope I've not made any decision that would cause me regret later on. Wish me luck! :D

YAY! I'm finally done with the Perfumes project! You cannot imagine how happy I was at 2pm today...one down,one more to go! :D

Received news that Midori has reached Florida safely already. She'll be there for four months for her attachment. g12 and Fridays will be unnaturally quiet without her around though...Anyway, if you happen to read this Midori, enjoy yourself ok? Don't forget us back home! :)


And I'm so proud of my brother (even though I'm still in a state of shock) that he is indisputably a guitar hero! His band got champion AGAIN for the second season of the "Zero to Hero" competition! My brother so coole worzxZxz!

So, being the inquisitive and ever-concerned older sister, I snooped around Facebook and found photos! (In case you were wondering, we didn't support him at the event cos he ran out of tickets to give us after giving them to his friends first. Such a loving brother!)

He vaguely reminds me of the promotional poster of "L" in "Detroit Metal City!"
Can't wait for the video of the event man...(Yeah, I know I sound too enthu but I rarely get to see my brother being so "alive and kickin" like this!) XD


Anyway, I'm glad that I went for Friday's youth service last week. The message was very apt, it was about love and dating: about overcoming your emotions and not letting it overwhelm you to the point that you get completely blinded by love, compromising your position as a child of God in the process. Sometimes, the temptations in this world can be hard to resist and we really have to be careful when it comes to choosing our life partner, especially at this age where the pressure to be attached is relatively high-at least to me.

To be honest, there are times when I wonder when the right one will come, how will he look like,etc...And I really hope that I won't let my heart rule over my head but it's tough at times...

"Finding someone who loves God and who loves you is worth the wait; no matter how long, no matter what it takes."

Seems like a tall order to fulfil but I guess I really have to trust in God. It's nice to love and be loved and appreciated by someone special but it will be disastrous (especially so for me, considering how emotional I am) if he's really not the right one for me.
My ideal relationship would be a sacrificial and, if possible, an unconditional one. One that transcends beyond the romance, one that goes beyond the superficiality of love relationships. A relationship that is mature, where both parties accept each other for who they are and, if necessary, put down their pride and change for the better. One in which mutual communication flows freely, where both parties identify with and share a mutual support of their visions and goals, a relationship that lasts...

Come to think of it, God is faithful and He knows me best. Even though it hurts to think about it, I have to say that what happened was done with my interests at heart and God was definitely aware of this much earlier than me.

There's still so much to learn and the maturation process is still evolving...Anyway, enough of that already lest I bore you...haha...

I miss Cui!!!

Cui! I can't find your call centre mugshot so this will do for the time being! XD

Ps: Rach, your turn next time! :P