Charice Pempengco in Korea - part 1

Young girl with a big voice! If I'm not wrong, her performance here prompted Ellen Degeneres to fly her all the way from her hometown (The Philippines) to be on Ellen's show!

straight from the horse's mouth...

I've never understood the power of Prayer and how it could impact me so deeply until tonight. Like everyone else at some point of their life, I was quite sceptical about Prayer. (In case you do not already know, Christians are humans too and are equally susceptible to making mistakes just like anyone else).

I do pray but occasionally, I'll have my doubts. Sometimes I get frustrated when I feel that nothing seems to be happening, or when Prayer seems like a one-way conversation and it feels like I'm talking to myself, but in this world where instant gratification becomes almost second nature, the notion of patience as a virtue becomes quite undervalued.

My thoughts are a little jumbled now but what I'm trying to say is this: When it comes to talking to God, it is the only time when you can really be your true self, where all the facades, the superficiality and the pride you parade in front of others (in order to gain their acceptance) gets stripped away, layer by layer, as you realise that there's nothing to hide in His presence cos He knows everything. You can really unload and tell Him everything in a way that you might not be able to with others (how you feel or felt about certain things, etc...). Sometimes, in the process, He will show you hints of what you should be doing/how you should be facing your problem instead. And the more you talk to Him and present to Him your version of things that happened, you gradually realise the loophole(s) which you might have overlooked before.

Prayer is like a tete-a-tete with God. As there is no pressure/interrogation from people that might instigate you to be defensive (and justifying your actions with whatever excuses you can come up with, at that point, to counter the verbal tirade), you start to gain perspective on where you have erred (if you're praying about a problem, that is).

You might be sceptical about Prayer but you never know, until you are actually in that situation where there seems to be no way out. Maybe it might help if you see it as a way of preventing yourself from wallowing in the mire of self-pity, when you actively seek to find solutions to your problem(s) instead.

You might also question why He doesn't answer your prayer(s) but then again, we must remember that God knows us better than we know ourselves. Our immaturity/lack of foresight might lead us to pray for things that are not appropriate to have at that point of time. Sometimes, He knows that you might be better off not having the thing you requested for,and it's only in the future when you look back again and realise that it is actually a blessing in disguise.

Then again, you might be doubting God due to Christians you have met, who do not seem to be walking the talk and exemplifying what they believe in, but remember that they are just like any individual, equally as vulnerable if they are not careful. In fact, God is aware of this irony when He says that "These people draw near to Me with their mouth, and honour Me with their lips, but their heart is far from Me." (Matthew 15:8-9).

Anyway, one thing's for sure: I think most of you will definitely agree that you cannot depend on your friends all the time, no matter how strong the friendship is, for they will surely fail you at some point. At these times, remember that God is always there when you're feeling your most vulnerable and when everything seems so bleak that it starts to overwhelm you to the extent that you start to lose hope in everything.

Remember that He is always willing to listen to whatever you have to say, even though you might feel that there is no weight in your words. If He can carry the weight of the world on His shoulders, then there really is no problem too big that He cannot solve.

I know that I'm the last person on earth to have the right to gush about the wonders of prayer but maybe by typing this out, it will serve as a reminder to seek Him instead of constantly looking to the left and right for answers all the time.

the week, of a nutcase, in a nutshell

YAY! I'M SO HAPPY HAPPY HAPPAYYEEE! :D

I've been on an adrenaline high (the unpleasant kind, mind you) for the past week due to the extra lectures to makeup for public holidays, Japanese Studies Project, the 2 French tests (which was so-so even though I felt that I could have done better for Oral), and the stooopid Stats Project, which not only caused a lack of sleep but significant hair loss (I could seriously see the increasing number of stray hairs on my shirt!). I'm not gonna see another "Gender and Book-carrying behaviour" experiment for good. The words are still swirling in my head man...

It felt as if my brain had to be on "thinking-mode" for the whole week, even though this should be the case, assuming that we should be "thinking" when we're in school but somehow, it made me think of a PC on hibernating mode with programs running in the background. And also, my right eye keeps twitching at random periods of the day for no particular reason...

Hmm..much as I'm relieved that this week is over, and Semester 2 finally coming to a close (save for exams), my behaviour this week was a little annoying, even to myself. I was more irritable than usual and got upset over the most trivial things and relapsed into the "in-your-face" kinda anti-social behaviour. Reminds me of one of the previous blog entries where I complained about my disgusting attitude too...hope this won't be a vicious cycle...

Anyway, I'm really grateful for my friends and the people around me who were very understanding and encouraging throughout the week. And I really have to thank God for Sarah, and subsequently Sylvia, who intervened at the right moment and assisting me with my Stats report. (At that time, I felt really helpless that I could not even identify the appropriate Statistics to run for my dataset that I asked God to find someone who would help me out. Turned out that the person He sent could not only provide much-needed help, but she took 3 out of the 4 modules I'm currently taking, coincidental or what?). On top of helping with the report, Sarah even gave me clues for the French tests, which she sat for earlier, which was really nice of her. Made me ponder about the "dog-eat-dog world" issue all over again...

Well, exams officially commences in 2 weeks' time and this week has really knocked some sense into me. However, I can feel myself getting more and more nonchalant about my academic state, which is quite worrying since exams are around the corner and the stuff I know about my 3 modules are insufficient to warrant a good grade. Sometimes I think I deserve to learn things the hard way man...

Besides that, this week was a rather eventful one. Tampines One is my new fave hangout cos Duc and I kept checking out the queue for Uniqlo (and wondering when we could ever go in, even though I kept suggesting that Plan B would have worked if we tried...haha!). Also, Sab and Maib went to g12 last Wednesday (so pai seh cos I was late that day when usually I would have so much time to kill!) and today was the ultimate cos I was out the whole day: school in the morning, lunch at Amoy, Tampines One (yet again), youth service, supper...

Found out that I was scheduled for Ladies' Basketball for the upcoming season. Wonder if I will survive the season, or even participate in it at all, cos Basketball is really no joke man. More scratches, more running, even though more pounds will be shed...

Arghh,really cannot take it anymore...that's all for now. Auditions tomorrow. Hope I've not made any decision that would cause me regret later on. Wish me luck! :D

YAY! I'm finally done with the Perfumes project! You cannot imagine how happy I was at 2pm today...one down,one more to go! :D

Received news that Midori has reached Florida safely already. She'll be there for four months for her attachment. g12 and Fridays will be unnaturally quiet without her around though...Anyway, if you happen to read this Midori, enjoy yourself ok? Don't forget us back home! :)


And I'm so proud of my brother (even though I'm still in a state of shock) that he is indisputably a guitar hero! His band got champion AGAIN for the second season of the "Zero to Hero" competition! My brother so coole worzxZxz!

So, being the inquisitive and ever-concerned older sister, I snooped around Facebook and found photos! (In case you were wondering, we didn't support him at the event cos he ran out of tickets to give us after giving them to his friends first. Such a loving brother!)

He vaguely reminds me of the promotional poster of "L" in "Detroit Metal City!"
Can't wait for the video of the event man...(Yeah, I know I sound too enthu but I rarely get to see my brother being so "alive and kickin" like this!) XD


Anyway, I'm glad that I went for Friday's youth service last week. The message was very apt, it was about love and dating: about overcoming your emotions and not letting it overwhelm you to the point that you get completely blinded by love, compromising your position as a child of God in the process. Sometimes, the temptations in this world can be hard to resist and we really have to be careful when it comes to choosing our life partner, especially at this age where the pressure to be attached is relatively high-at least to me.

To be honest, there are times when I wonder when the right one will come, how will he look like,etc...And I really hope that I won't let my heart rule over my head but it's tough at times...

"Finding someone who loves God and who loves you is worth the wait; no matter how long, no matter what it takes."

Seems like a tall order to fulfil but I guess I really have to trust in God. It's nice to love and be loved and appreciated by someone special but it will be disastrous (especially so for me, considering how emotional I am) if he's really not the right one for me.
My ideal relationship would be a sacrificial and, if possible, an unconditional one. One that transcends beyond the romance, one that goes beyond the superficiality of love relationships. A relationship that is mature, where both parties accept each other for who they are and, if necessary, put down their pride and change for the better. One in which mutual communication flows freely, where both parties identify with and share a mutual support of their visions and goals, a relationship that lasts...

Come to think of it, God is faithful and He knows me best. Even though it hurts to think about it, I have to say that what happened was done with my interests at heart and God was definitely aware of this much earlier than me.

There's still so much to learn and the maturation process is still evolving...Anyway, enough of that already lest I bore you...haha...

I miss Cui!!!

Cui! I can't find your call centre mugshot so this will do for the time being! XD

Ps: Rach, your turn next time! :P

My legs are aching (yet again). In normal circumstances when I'm sore,exhausted and aching all over, I would have been too lazy/tired to blog but I'm feeling in da' mood to do so...

First of all, I am content and VERY thankful for today's match. We were the underdogs! We thrashed Region B 35-8! Initially, I thought that this match would be a goner (honestly!) cos we were short of players and plus we were playing against Region B, who had a couple of netball players in their team so, the odds of winning were very promising for them. However, Hope came in the form of Crystal, Gloria and Faith, whom Pastor Quee Beng roped in to make up our numbers. All 3 of them are shooters (Gloria's from tpjc netball!) and it was really nice that the shots came fast and furious such that I didn't feel that I was working too hard on court. In fact, I actually wanted the ball to come to Defence (my side) just so I could work a little more, haha!
But Region B displayed good sportsmanship even though they knew they were on the losing edge, which was really admirable.

And I found out that Faith is actually Mr.Bok's niece! (Mr.Bok as in the fierce netball tyrant of a coach for secondary schools netball! He's like the "Nelson Kwei of netball", just many times worser cos of his temper and his reputation for being able to reduce the most aggressive and toughest player to tears!)

And of course, how can I not mention my virgin experience of running to/at Bedok Reservoir at night? Haha! All I can say was that the "warm up" prior to the run was comparable to secondary school training days due to "the refusal to embrace technology that's on your doorstep" by a certain someone!haha! (inside joke, for those who don't get it!)

Eugene's surprise birthday in the morning was not as successful as we thought it would be cos Eugene got smarter! HAHA! And as usual, he had to undergo his "series of unforgettable challenges" before he could get his present (panties, pills and a bag!)

Arrgghh..my eyelids are getting heavier...but before I end, I HAVE to get this off my chest...

Imogen Heap has been working very conscientiously on her new album for a very long time and I'm starting to get impatient.WHEN ISSIT COMING OUT?! I can't wait to hear and be inspired by her songs again, especially "Tidal."

She collaborated with a Hindi singer, of whom she holds in high regard, for this track. I get excited just thinking of the way she praises his vocals in a way that makes me want to listen to it immediately. Usually she'll sneak some previews of the songs she's working on on her vlog just to give us a feel of the album and how it will sound like but for THAT particular song, she intentionally refused to play parts with his vocals to keep us in suspense! GRRR!

And I just realised that "Imogen Heap" is supposed to be pronounced as "EE-MO-JERN" instead of "EE-MO-GURN."

I'm off!

Hello again!

I'm feeling terribly irritable today. I got upset/annoyed by the smallest things my friends did/said. I couldn't concentrate in lecture at all and even though I was listening to the lecturer, I wasn't comprehending what she said and I was spacing out more than usual! The worse thing was I didn't feel like socialising today cos normally I would at least try and make an effort to create small talk with acquaintances or people I've just met/been introduced to but I didn't feel like it today totally.
Maybe it's the feeling of going back to school again: "journey-ing to the West" all the time, climbing those dreaded slopes, inclines,hills and staircases in school,meeting up for projects and catching up on readings, hating the feeling that my eyes get dry and my face gets very oily whenever I'm in school, running after buses, etc...(Okok, I should count my blessings...at least I'm not starving and dying under the hot sun in my makeshift cardboard house in Africa...)

But at least I'm not feeling as cranky, now that I'm home - all showered and reclined in a comfortable position, typing this..haha...(sometimes I don't understand my moodswings...)

Mid-sem break's over and I felt like I haven't done any "proper resting" yet. If I had to summarise what I've done for the break and give it a name, it will be called "minor hassles and annoyances" week. Aside from Dhab's departure and the Perfumes project meeting, which isn't a hassle because it has to be done, I felt that the rest of my time was spent doing things that I didn't enjoy due to obligations and answering to certain people whom I'm starting to get really annoyed with, REALLY annoyed. You and you, stop bothering me with your talk of dreams and success, serious! I know you mean well but you don't have to resort to such tactics to get me in.

Anyway, I'm quite happy and satisfied cos I achieved a new first yesterday! I completed a 10-km run in approximately 1 hour 10mins! :D
Even though I almost vomited at the finishing line - ALMOST but I swallowed it back, thank God that the weather was perfect at that time, I had stitches which were insignificant enough to cause pain (although I discovered new areas in my body where I could get stitches) and I didn't walk, which was an achievement for me cos I wasn't really prepared for the run.
I knew my body was still doing fine at the 5-km marker but when I hit 8-km, I couldn't feel my legs at all and my toes seemed to be separate entities, moving grudgingly against my will. Nat was invincible -no complications, unlike me with stitches and bouts of nausea. He was the Speed Racer of the day, charging full throttle and overtaking others without a care in the world, right Nat? :P

I gained a new insight that day: Never look down on old people (old=45 years old and above). Even though they started 15 minutes later than the youth category, many ah pehs and some aunties overtook me. One uncle, who overtook me, even had the energy to advise me to "swing my arms" and not rest them on my hips! I salute them man....

On another note, I couldn't walk properly today cos the joints at my knees are aching terribly and climbing stairs was a burden. Butt muscles are most likely to hurt next too, I can feel it...

OK, gotta' go! Craving for some nice,cold chocolate milk now :D

to everything, there is a season...

This was supposed to be a much happier and sentimental post but because of my stoooopid laptop case, it just ruined everything! 'Just discovered that my new, chio and flamboyant laptop case IS NOT OF THE RIGHT SIZE!!! (short of a few more inches!) and the best thing is that I can't ask for a refund, neither can I exchange it for a bigger size!! I think Yee, Dhab and Cui will just explode if they know about this cos they accompanied me to find the case (of which I took ages to decide on).

Breathe in, breathe out.....arghhhh!!!!

OK! Anyway, the month of February has not been a very satisfying one, mostly due to some stupid issues and school, of which I have not been really motivated to study as hard as I'm supposed to be, but I won't delve into that now.

Another reason would be due to the fact that some of the most cherished people in my life would soon be leaving for greener pastures (or so it seems cos I'm in an escapist mood right now and anywhere would seem better than Singapore at the moment).

Rachel, you've been a really, really wonderful friend to have: one whom I can just joke and laugh and be wild with without feeling embarrassed or conscious about. Come to think of it, you added the extra zest to JC life: your screaming and suaning and butt-smacking (how can you and I EVER forget that) and last-min homework and all the endless laughter.

Even though all these took place within a short period of less than 2 years, it was enough to make class life in JC extra enjoyable. Didn't realise the extent of how awkward it would be to know that you'll not be on local soil for a long time to come, until the dinner a few weeks back. You'll be greatly missed, panic partner! Come back and visit during the hols! :)


AND Cui, all this while I have been living in some sort of self-denial, telling myself that you're only leaving a few months later. Months became weeks, which gradually were reduced to days and thinking about it really makes me feel sad now. No more random dates after school to your place, no more live music with you and Ngak (heh heh), ranting and raving sessions would not be as convenient as before now that you're gone :(

Anyway, I can't emphasise enough how much you mean to me after all these years. We've seen each other grow and (hopefully) mature through secondary school, shared our new experiences gained during JC and now,we're embarking on another stage of our life (makes me think about the marriage/children list we had back in secondary school with the rest man!). Hmm, feels weird telling you this through my blog instead of a letter but at least you get to see it still (and you wouldn't lose it, like how you lost my previous letter!).

OK, I think I better stop here before I get too emotional. Don't forget us when you're there ok? And you better come back often to see us hor! It's an order! :D


Also, Dhab! 'Know you're leaving next week but I enjoyed spending time with you too! Hope you feel likewise even though many things have changed since the last time you were in SG. Hopefully the Melbourne trip in July will be a success 'cos the only obstacle (and probably the biggest one) would be my parents but nevertheless, I'll try my best to persuade them. Until then! :D

Can't wait to leave Singapore man.